Am I Supposed To be Sadder?

I keep wondering If I am sad enough. Should I be crying more? Should I be having meltdowns? How am I supposed to be reacting?

I keep wondering if What the fuck am I supposed to be doing?

Why are people fucking watching?

Am I not sad because I don't have any guilt?

Don't get me wrong I am sad and definitely heartbroken but am I showing it correctly?

Is there is right to be sad? Do I care how people see me?

I don't! I know exactly what is being said about me or the whisper, but I don't care.

The truth is Matthew loved me and I loved him, and we spent the past year in love. It was everything we both needed. So, maybe that is why I'm not the movie sad.

So, am I supposed to be sadder?

I don't know. No one really knows. So, I don't know.

You reading this don't know. We just don't know.